My Fencing Coach

Wel­come to the world of Janusz Bed­nars­ki, fenc­ing coach.

What he says (thick Pol­ish accent): Teo­retikally, you all dzould be do-ink dee prac­tiss ev-er‑y day.

What he means: Get off your lazy bums and show some ini­tia­tive, damn kids.

S: Ahh, dee at-let­ic office has writ­ten me zis let­ter (waves piece of paper) dat has very much per­sons on dee team ahh, list-ed. teo­retikally, you all dzould be sign­ing dee names to zem.

M: You are Notre Dame stu­dents, don’t you even know how to write your damn name? Stop cre­at­ing use­less paper­work for me.

S: ahh, ha-lo Michal (mee-how) my friend, i zee you are late for the prac­tiss-ing again. Have you been out do-ink za drinkink and the dancink, and the par­tyink?

M: Next time you show up late i’m going to cas­trate you.

S: Now, ahh up! up! every­body and form da lines and do dee run­nink. now…when i clasp you are jumpink and touch­ink the roof. on sec­ond clasp you are do-ink it leel bit faster.

M: I want to see you run around like idiots.