Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One

Okay, so

Tom Waits, Roberto Begnini
and John Lurie are in a
jail in Lousiana and they’ve
got one cig­a­rette left. The
con­crete walls sweat with
hu­mid­ity and the mat­tresses
stink like stale sweat and dry
urine. These guys have one
cig­a­rette and a pack of cards.
Begnini don’t play gin
and Lurie won’t play spades.
Waits would play with him­self
but the oth­ers might see. So
no one uses the cards and
in­stead they all worry about
that last smoke. Lurie’s
got the coffin-nail in his pocket
he knows he’ll have to share it
if he lights it up. Maybe if he
waits un­til the oth­ers are asleep. 

Waits sticks to his bunk like an old gym sock
and Lurie paces. Begnini won’t shut up.
They’re all think­ing about the last
cig­a­rette. Well, Waits is think­ing about
wait­ing un­til Lurie falls asleep and steal­ing it.
His name is pa­tient. Begnini is think­ing about
baked ziti and what it felt like to crush
a man’s skull with a pool ball.

They are a good egg, down by law.

I watched Jim Jarmusch’s Down By Law a while back.

Speak your piece