5 Loads of Laundry

6.9.02 EXT. NORTH QUAD 1:00pm DAY

4 more hours of drudgery in the lafo com­put­er clus­ter result­ed in two things 1) i real­ized i am a mere pawn in a cos­mic game of screw-the-deal­er euchre 2) a new icon for ver­bal impo­tence. then i went into the glo­ri­ous out­doors and lay around shirt­less for awhile absorb­ing free rad­i­cals in an attempt to speed up my muta­tion process and grow a third eye. (every­one else thought i was just get­ting a tan, lit­tle do they know my plans for them). then i did 5 loads of laun­dry and wrote a poem out­side while the machines were remov­ing the oils, excre­tions, hairs, dead skin and var­i­ous oth­er offal from my cloth­ing. i even washed the appro­pri­at­ed coat.

in oth­er news, my quest to Rule the World by Dom­i­na­tion Through Squir­rels infomer­cial has been met with less than enthu­si­as­tic respons­es by the US Gov­ern­ment. it appears that they have devel­oped their own squir­rel army and my infomer­cial would com­pro­mise their “strate­gic goals” to con­trol the Arab nut mar­ket. what­ev­er. the inter­est­ing thing is that this site has actu­al­ly been vis­it­ed by the US gov­ern­ment. it shows up on my web­stats. i have also had vis­its from the US mil­i­tary, Cana­da, Aus­tralia, Aus­tria, and Malaysia. Cana­da might be Pete…Austria might by Don, but i have no idea what else. its prob­a­bly a good thing i removed the “how to build a nuclear bomb” demo from my site before the mil­i­tary saw it.