What is the Difference?

what is the difference between innocence and confidence, pleasure and happiness? what ambitions derive their source in our darker selves and what does the light side contain of power? why do inanities distract us from meaning and structured understanding of motivation, desire, and actualization? why do we live out our time in rote mechanisms that turn life into an ‘insert slot-A into connecting tab-B’ in order to get the capitalist bourgeois lifestyle that offers no true chance at meaningful examination of life? why do i struggle against this while at the same time desiring the simplicity of a herd mentality life?