Smober the Sock Goblin lives under your stairs
if your home doesn’t have them still he is there.
He’s clammy and dusty and a little bit mad
not angry — but crazy — and little bit bad.

When Smober the Sock Goblin comes out to eat
he crosses the floor with slapping bare feet.
He goes to the dryer and opens it wide
then stands on his tiptoes and peers deep inside.

Then Smober the Sock Goblin begins to drool
and gets a gleam in his eye that is terribly cruel.
In he reaches and steals every left sock
and takes them all home to cook in his crock.

Smober the Sock Goblin stews them in oil
and dances a jig as he watches them boil.
When he is sure that they are quite done
He slops them out on a dryer lint bun.

He gives his sharp teeth a little black lick
He gulps down those socks quick quick quick.
That’s where the socks go — if you even care -
Smober the Sock Goblin eats half the pair!