my first truly personal experience with antique furniture was during potty training. my potty chair was this tiny wooden seat with a hole in it. inside the hole was a porcelain chamber pot. in back of the seat was a little door which gave access to the chamber pot. it also had a pullover restraint/table that now reminds me of the safety bars on rollercoasters. except in this case i’m relatively sure the restraint was to keep me from escaping. something i never understood about my potty chair, and to this day still do not understand completely was the little flip-up penis-guard. it was basically a wooden codpiece. it is also the only thing keeping a picture of me on my potty chair from being x‑rated. i think i would rather have been exposed. at least then i would have had my dignity.
eventually i made it to the stage where i learned to use the real toilet. when i would go into the bathroom by myself i would strip off all of my clothes, do my business, and announce that i was finished. once mom opened the door, i would scurry out bareassed and run away. i get the feeling i made myself naked quite a bit as a child.
but now that i am a housebroken adult, i can use the shitter like a normal person.
i wonder what freud would say about all of this.
We are all very proud of your accomplished toilet use.
As long as you can pee standing up now…