Office Space

Today I am learn­ing about MAP [Man­ag­ing Account­abil­i­ty and Per­for­mance] Goals in a day-long train­ing ses­sion for new hires. These are goals that we set for our­selves to accom­plish over the next year. It is all a bunch of self-aggran­diz­ing hoo-ha. We have to make up goals that fit with com­pa­ny goals, site goals and team goals while still walk­ing the fine line between com­ing up with goals that can be accom­plished indi­vid­u­al­ly. I don’t want to have a goal of world dom­i­na­tion for exam­ple, because that is unre­al­is­tic for one year. At the same time, start­ing up a total­i­tar­i­an dic­ta­tor­ship in my cube is on the oth­er extreme, way to easy. So per­haps enslav­ing the mem­bers of my team and bind­ing them to my will is a real­is­tic goal.

It all reminds me of that scene in Office Space where Bill Lum­bergh is dis­cussing the use of two dif­fer­ent time sheets and then intro­duces the Bobs. I’ve got that arti­cle by Der­ri­da that was rec­om­mend­ed the oth­er day to read when things get bor­ing. Time to go.

6 Replies

  • Every day I feel like I’m in that movie, or per­haps a soap opera ver­sion of it. .…As the OIT turns.…

  • Ah..
    M.A.P.

    M.A.P.
    blows ASS!!!

    Have they made you take the “it’s all about you”
    class yet?

  • luck­i­ly, i did­nt get a job in a cubi­cle. i have my own lit­tle cozy office. coun­sel­ing would­nt real­ly work in a cubi­cle any­way.

  • I know I will nev­er work in a cubi­cle, or with a “team” of oth­ers, or even in a tra­di­tion­al office. I RULE!

  • Dude, Neal, my friend. You just damned your­self. Because I’m sure each one of us was say­ing the same damn thing before we start­ed work­ing in cubi­cle-land. And yet… here we are.

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