Customer Service

I hate moth­er­fuck­ing, here jump-through-this hoop, and this hoop, and this hoop, fill it out in trip­li­cate with a vir­gin wit­ness and then so sor­ry we’re closed come back when it isn’t The Feast of St. Bureaucrat, cock-block­ing red tape. So here is a not good po­em.

Press one to speak
in trip­li­cate tongues
of flame in my head
ache; Now serv­ing
no​.one has a
straight an­swer.

Please hold.
Please hold.

The no​.you have
di­aled is out of
ser­vice with a
smile; Now serv­ing
no​.one in their
right mind.

Please hold.
Please hold.

Closed for
lunch and just
be­cause; Now serv­ing
no​.one wants
to be here.

Ain’t noth­ing slow­er
than the speed of