Alternative Ways to Squeeze the Charmin

• Vise Grips.
• Drop an anvil on it.
• With your thighs.
• Throw it into a black hole.
• Raise its property taxes.
• Trash compactor.
• Using some fat guy’s man-breasts.
• Using some hot chick’s woman-breasts.
• Belly flopping on it.
• With Dynamic Tension™.

Comments and conversations on this post

  1. peppermintlisa

    is this your McSweeney’s Lists entry?

  2. Adam Harvey

    I’m one of the few people who don’t find McSweeney’s funny. I don’t particularly think this entry is very funny either, but I was bored.

  3. peppermintlisa

    sigh. i thought it was humorous, in a smug sort of way.

    but i find McSweeneys often funny. not in an overt way, but in a these-people-have-the-same-nerdy-humor-mindset-as-me sort of way. in a chuckling sort of way.

  4. Adam Harvey

    I actually know a woman named Charmin and she makes jokes about not squeezing the Charmin all the time.

  5. jmay

    Adam catch me online or give me a call in the next couple of days. I may have a line one some webconsulting work for a little side income.

  6. Adam Harvey

    I was gonna call you tonight anyway, man. I talked to Christy a bit last week.