mostly packed and ready to get the hell out of south bend for a few days. i hope i can fit everything into my car, but i’m not too worried. this summer will be used to heal the damage that this year has done to me, both physically (with my knee) and mentally (pretty much everything else). if all this shit builds character, i’m gonna be one tough mofo. the thing is, i think i have quite enough character already thank you very much. i have a nice start to my summer reading list, i wonder how much i will read before i get back to ND.
i am a transient being, ethereal and fleeting. i leave no marks behind me, just fading memories. constancy is my style, yet it is the constancy of change and readaptation, paradox. where i go no one wants to follow because it is too confusing. out of confusion springs enlightenment. if you stare at the white noise long enough, you will be able to see the superficiality of existence and the complexity of nothingness. no one really wants to be enlightened, they are much more satisfied to let the responsibility for living and breathing and acting fall on anyone but themselves. i pity those who cannot recognize the power inherent in themselves, inherent in every person, the power to change reality and create that which was only imagined.
today marks the beginning of my finals week rally behavior. no shaving, minimum grooming, only necessary washing. i’ll be wearing the same clothes until i go home on the 9th. disgusting i know. there is a reason. it makes marmoset hunting much easier. the pygmy marmoset is the tangible form that all things stressful in my life take with me. so around finals time they have been breeding all semester and now coordinate an all out offensive for my soul. i must bend all of my psychic energies to defeating them and keeping their nefarious plan to overthrow the universe at bay. this semester i have an ally: the Notre Dame squirrel. since i have made friends with them they have agreed to act as my infantry. i like aminals (*twitch twitch*)
we have to start packing up our rooms in the next week. it seems kind of dumb that they expect us to move everything out of our living space and study for finals in a little white shell. hopefully the weather will be nice and i can do my work outside. i am anxious for the summer to get here because it will be much less stressful. the good thing is that i have minimal work for the rest of the year. i am starting on one of my final papers and hopefully i’ll get a good jump on it before the week is over. today is going to be a good day. it is supposed to thunderstorm severely which is very nice, but right now it is sunny and warm. i’ll enjoy either. thats my goal now, just to enjoy things instead of stewing in my own juices. i don’t make for a good marinade.