Ready to Go

Wednesday, 8 May 2002

5.8.02 INT. KEOUGH HALL RM. 435 2:03pm DAY

most­ly packed and ready to get the hell out of south bend for a few days. i hope i can fit every­thing in­to my car, but i’m not too wor­ried. this sum­mer will be used to heal the dam­age that this year has done to me, both phys­i­cal­ly (with my knee) and men­tal­ly (pret­ty much every­thing else). if all this shit builds char­ac­ter, i’m gonna be one tough mo­fo. the thing is, i think i have quite enough char­ac­ter al­ready thank you very much. i have a nice start to my sum­mer read­ing list, i won­der how much i will read be­fore i get back to ND.

i am a tran­sient be­ing, ethe­re­al and fleet­ing. i leave no marks be­hind me, just fad­ing mem­o­ries. con­stan­cy is my style, yet it is the con­stan­cy of change and readap­ta­tion, para­dox. where i go no one wants to fol­low be­cause it is too con­fus­ing. out of con­fu­sion springs en­light­en­ment. if you stare at the white noise long enough, you will be able to see the su­per­fi­cial­i­ty of ex­is­tence and the com­plex­i­ty of noth­ing­ness. no one re­al­ly wants to be en­light­ened, they are much more sat­is­fied to let the re­spon­si­bil­i­ty for liv­ing and breath­ing and act­ing fall on any­one but them­selves. i pity those who can­not rec­og­nize the pow­er in­her­ent in them­selves, in­her­ent in every per­son, the pow­er to change re­al­i­ty and cre­ate that which was on­ly imag­ined.

to­day i am bubon­ic

Dead Animal

Monday, 6 May 2002

5.6.02 INT. DEBARTOLO HALL RM. 316 9:43am DAY

there is a reason i smell like a dead animal.

marmoset body count: four

new film link: curious

today i am rancid

Rally Behavior

Friday, 3 May 2002

to­day marks the be­gin­ning of my fi­nals week ral­ly be­hav­ior. no shav­ing, min­i­mum groom­ing, on­ly nec­es­sary wash­ing. i’ll be wear­ing the same clothes un­til i go home on the 9th. dis­gust­ing i know. there is a rea­son. it makes mar­moset hunt­ing much eas­i­er. the pygmy mar­moset is the tan­gi­ble form that all things stress­ful in my life take with me. so around fi­nals time they have been breed­ing all se­mes­ter and now co­or­di­nate an all out of­fen­sive for my soul. i must bend all of my psy­chic en­er­gies to de­feat­ing them and keep­ing their ne­far­i­ous plan to over­throw the uni­verse at bay. this se­mes­ter i have an al­ly: the Notre Dame squir­rel. since i have made friends with them they have agreed to act as my in­fantry. i like am­i­nals (*twitch twitch*)

to­day i am clean


Wednesday, 24 April 2002

we have to start pack­ing up our rooms in the next week. it seems kind of dumb that they ex­pect us to move every­thing out of our liv­ing space and study for fi­nals in a lit­tle white shell. hope­ful­ly the weath­er will be nice and i can do my work out­side. i am anx­ious for the sum­mer to get here be­cause it will be much less stress­ful. the good thing is that i have min­i­mal work for the rest of the year. i am start­ing on one of my fi­nal pa­pers and hope­ful­ly i’ll get a good jump on it be­fore the week is over. to­day is go­ing to be a good day. it is sup­posed to thun­der­storm se­vere­ly which is very nice, but right now it is sun­ny and warm. i’ll en­joy ei­ther. thats my goal now, just to en­joy things in­stead of stew­ing in my own juices. i don’t make for a good mari­nade.